Hit

But if there's on thing in my life

that these years have taught

it's that you can always see it coming

but you can never stop it

                         -Cowboy Junkies

So-called "special" days and holidays hit me hard in a very bad way, and it isn't something I seem to have any control over.  It just happens and it is very hard to get through. It's getting worse and worse every year.  It starts a few days before, no matter what is going on or not going on. I wish I could stop it, make it stop, make it go away, but I cannot. It hits and I cannot get out of the path no matter what.

It's bad.

I am over-encumbered, and have been for far too long.  I have already dropped everything that can be dropped but it didn't make a difference.

*****
I posted an article on Facebook yesterday to acknowledge that not everyone shares in the experience of having a great mother. Someone messaged me privately to say thank you, that it meant a lot to them to see that even though they weren't going to "like" it publicly for personal reasons.

I guess that's why I stick so much of my personal stuff out there, because we are so inundated with affirmations, positive memes, expectations to feel/react in certain ways, and so many people are really struggling.  It's good to encounter things to relate to instead of someone telling you to think positive bullshit thoughts.

Empathy.