Found in Imagination

 Carey and I finished a series.

The concept is one "found object" placed in an imaginary background.

I got to pull out my iridescent and interference paints.

All the paintings are 5x7 oil on oil-primed linen panels.

Quail Egg

Autumn

2020 Self Portrait

Puffer World

Ode to PG50

Ritz

Palette Piles in Perspective

The Lookout

Painters Tape

Earth Stone

Here are my objects, with Pebbles.

Not pictured: The Ritz bc I ate it.

The palette paper is more of a composite, so that's also not pictured.
And the quail egg is a different egg.

City Walk

I'm going nuts.

Crazy.

Mad.

Insane.
I. Need. To. Get. Out.

It has been a few weeks since i went painting and I wasn't up for it today, either.  I just wanted to get outside and move.

So I went for a walk.

I started at 59th and Lexington, then moved east downtown on 5th.
There was no plan except "downtown".

********

At the intersection of 44th and 5th ave, I saw the most coordinated thing.....maybe (because I have gone crazy as mentioned above) it isn't a big deal but I was so seriously impressed......

A man was riding on a bicycle going east on 44th street.

Delivery guy.

Busy intersection.

Cars.

People.

City stuff.

As he was coming into the intersection he reached behind and pulled out a cup, coffee cup, disposable with lid.... and as he crossed in the middle of the intersection in perfect balance riding that bike and he took a long drink of his coffee.

Then he reached behind and put it back in whatever was holding it.

Completely smooth and natural.

I guess if you can ride a bike one-handed that's no big deal but.... I could never be that coordinated.

So I think it was very impressive.

And it looked cool.

*******

I continued downtown and ended up in the village.

Washington Square Park.

Andrew the pianist was out with his piano. (@andrewtheartist on insta)

Singing.

People dancing.

The old guy in the picture uses a walker to get around and he put it aside to dance.

I have seen Andrew out before, he's always out playing.

Even in the subway.

I have absolutely no clue how he lugs that piano around but he does, and he's really, really good.

Excellent singer, too.

He spreads joy and he knows it and he loves it.

I felt some of that today and I really needed it.

I should go paint in Washington Square Park.

*******

Here is a sign for an independent film (I think) that is trying to get viewers on West Broadway and Spring St.

I have no idea what it is a bout, probably a garbage no-budget independent thing but their logo is pretty fantastic.

I looked the film up, here is the link.

Canal Street is still garbage.

I kept going downtown and ended up at the World Trade Center Memorial.

Normally I don't go down there because it makes me really sad.

I missed maybe being a name on those fountains by about a half hour.

But I went and did not feel sad today.

It really was a gorgeous day.

Here is the memorial... it is 2 fountains and all the names are engraved on the sides.

I thought maybe a family member put this rose on this name, but no...

The memorial staff does it for everyone's birthday.

There were 2 birthdays today.

Then it was time to go home.

The Broadway Nassau station (which was always part of Fulton St but just had a different name) was renamed to Fulton St as part of all the construction that happened there.

Apparently the MTA did it without approval from the historic society.... it was not an approved name change.  I bet a few people were pretty mad about it.

It IS less confusing to call the whole station by the same name but I think they should still pay some homage to the old Broadway-Nassau name because of the history.

Old pic I did not take.

***********

My whole walk was 7.2 miles and I feel like I still need to move more.... I came home but was not especially tired out.

i think today is wednesday?

Everything is running together, I don't know one day from another.
I have still been coping with bad anxiety but yesterday it started to ease a bit.

I did get some Bach Rescue Remedy, completely forgot about it until recently.
My acoustic foam arrives on Friday.

Pebbles had her echocardiogram yesterday, they tacked on an extra $75 to take her blood pressure.
I still do not have the results.

I have 10/10 paintings ready for the final layer.
The last one which I started today is a good end to the series.
Overall I am happy with the project.  Carey and I will post together on Monday.

I have been deeply avoiding homework for my Will Weston class.
Haven't done anything for it this week. He did say my idea is "gorgeous".

We are almost out of 2020.... incredibly, December starts next week. I have been at home for 8 months now. I hope next year is better.  I have to keep reminding myself that everything in life is open to positive change, even if I can't see it now.

I think I have figure drawing tonight, I sure hope so.  It's hard to remember anything much these days.
Hopefully next year we can all start meeting in-person again.

Lisa I am thinking of you and sending you good thoughts.  

43rd Street

A friend had a Very Nice Box sent to her by some friends/coworkers.
In the Very Nice Box was a set of Unison Pastels that cost over $300. And some paper.

And it was sent to the wrong address.
This was discovered last night.

Fedex said the package was delivered, no signature required.

Everyone said "Oh shit....."

I know where the incorrect address is, and I know it cannot be a residential address and I said so.
Since my friend and the incorrect address are here in NYC, and so am I, but no one else is, and I have the day off, I said I would go check it out.

If there is anyone in the world who can magnetize a box of pastels, it is me.

I went to the incorrect address at 43rd and 5th and got the Very Nice Box.
My friend is at 43rd and 11th so I walked over there.
I called my friend to say "Hi! I am here with a Very Nice Box!"
She said "I am not home!"
I said "Where are you?"
She said "44th and 5th!"
.........

I asked if I could just leave the box at her front door. She said they won't let me in the building, but the fun thing about that is I just walked in, right past security, and no one said anything. I even looked right at the security guard to see if they would stop me, and also because I was confused on where to go... but I figured it out.

So I left the box in front of her door and she got it and all is well.

Week 2 Homework

Tonight I turned in what I *think* is the homework for week 2 of my class....
I'm not the only one who is very confused by what's expected.

I also don't really have a sense of what our final project will be, so I'm kind of flying blind.

Story prompt:
"A girl goes into her father's workshop and sees the most beautiful kite ever made."

********
My post in the class thread, so I don't have to duplicate efforts:

Here is my hw this week, I ran out of time but I hope it is enough to communicate my research and concept. (My cat is sick, my daughter turned 15 and work needed me to …. work!!)

A Dutch 1660s girl walks into her father’s workshop and sees…. a Starry Night (Van Gogh) kite.

Vermeer (& other Dutch Master Friends) + Van Gogh + my guy Eyvind Earle <3

• Setting is Holland, 1660s. (I found research saying kids there flew diamond kites as early as 1618.)
• Movie: Girl with a Pearl Earring
• Layout artist/design genius: Eyvind Earle

So...... idk if I am on the right track or not, guess I will find out Saturday when critique comes out.

*******

I'm having bad trouble with anxiety this week.
Like, really bad.

And despite my monumental efforts to control it and feel better, it has been a struggle.
I'm trying to not feel the way I feel, maybe that's the problem.

In the Reuters class, right before we got started, Leah asked about it.... and saying out loud some of what's going on made me realize.... yeah, it's a lot.

• Lots of homework stress- I paid a lot for this class and I really want to get as much out of it as possible.
  
• Pebbles being sick and medication and upcoming tests and the ma$$ive vet bills
• Still working on my 10 paintings for the end of the month
• There were layoffs at work this week (not me thank goodness) and yet more change coming
• Daya turned 15
• Covid numbers are back to 3% so schools closed again on Wednesday
• General Covid burnout
• wow Thanksgiving is next week.  Holidays always get to me.
• There is some new weird ceiling thunder from upstairs. And in all honesty it isn't constant and it isn't their music (I think they did something to soundproof because that isn't an issue anymore & it is the same tenants) but it sounds like pounding on the ceiling, stomping in one place maybe.  Maybe someone up there is exercising. Idk what the f it is. I don't think it is from anything they are doing beyond normal living. My building just has terrible (no) sound insulation. They are pretty noisy in general but this new thunder is unpleasant. It sounds like one of those huge drums you see in marching bands and is coming from one specific place.

********
And that's what put me over the edge. Noise sure will do it.  I have issues there, and I even know why but it is hard to deal with. And it doesn't help that I'm stuck at home in one room all day every day for the most part for a very extended time.

I'm not allowed to properly soundproof my ceiling (I tried) so I have done nothing, but another crazed round of research has me get some 4" professional-grade acoustic foam panels. (Class A fire-retardant, I will absolutely NOT put a fire hazard in my home.) I know acoustic foam is for absorbing sounds coming from within a room, but it can help in absorbing outside sounds as well.  If I can get the general banging around from upstairs muffled, that will be good enough. 
I can blur the rest with white noise.  

So I'm going to give it a try. I have to do.... something.

Humanity in general needs to evolve into incorporating effective sound-blocking technology into peoples' environments.
I'm not alone in my stress from sound. It's a very real thing.

*********
Anyhow, I didn't realize that everything this week just built up. Just hearing/seeing it laid out was.... well, helpful. 

Obvious things aren't always obvious.

Weds Drawing

Wednesday drawing has turned into storytime drawing.
We have been listening to The Old Curiosity Shop by Charles Dickens.

I think Simon really stumbled on to something pretty great with this. Everyone loves it.

I have been having a pretty bad time with anxiety and I did not feel very focused but this is what I have... graphite.  Model was Madeline.

20 mins

1 hour-ish

What Stacey Said

I have a Facebook friend named Stacey.
We knew each other in high school.
She had many more friends than I ever did.

She was always nice to me, but we weren't friends to the level that we socialized outside of school.
She could sing, she was pretty, she had money, and friends, and was basically the kind of person I could never be like.

But we are Facebook friends today.

My other friend from high school, Janet, posted this:

Stacey wrote:

"Jessica lives an amazing life and is an extremely talented artist."

******
I can't see it.

My life is nowhere even close to being amazing.
It's just.... not.
I do paint, that's true, but I'm an unknown with no artistic professional accomplishments and....
yeah. 

I don't think anyone would willingly trade with me, except maybe a few hours so they could get some peace and quiet if they need that, but beyond that.... nope.

I said:
"Really unsure about the "amazing life" bit.... but at least someone thinks so!"

Stacey said:
"You have raised a ridiculously talented child, live in one of the most competitive areas of the country and you make beautiful art for the world while you do it...amazing!"

Well, it IS true that my child is ridiculously talented.
I can't deny that part.

I think, though, that I will look through Stacey's eyes for a bit.

People don't know what they don't know.

I guess I don't know what I don't know, either.

15

Daya is 15 today.

I got her a present which she loves.....a toaster.
She wanted a toaster that pops up.

It scares her every time it pops up but she really loves it.

Pebbles likes it, too.

Daya took these great selfies.

****

Drusilla sent another amazing painting in the Daya/Pebbles ballet series!

These are so special.

****

We ordered sushi in.

I got Daya a caramel tres leches cake which she likes a lot.

She had trouble blowing out all the candles.

She finally managed......

......and then three candles came back to life!

Tomorrow she will go visit her friend.

It was a quiet celebration this year,
I hope the world is more settled for her 16th and we can have a larger celebration.

Pebbles Update

Today was a weird blah odd day.
Pebbles went to the vet as I mentioned this morning.

She has a heart murmur.
It is new.
Which means something is going on.

The only way to find out what is going on is to have an echocardiogram.
Which costs $500.
Today cost $400.
This is the crappy part of having pets.
The vet told me about a payment plan thing I need to investigate.

I asked the vet "What if I don't do anything?"

The vet said if something is going on she could throw a blood clot and have a stroke, or it could go in a limb and she would be in a lot of pain, could also cause blindness......and the bill on dealing with that would be a lot worse.

And also I know she would suffer and Daya would be devastated.

It could be nothing or she might have to go on heart medication.
We think Pebbles is 11-12 years old.

So I think I have to do...something.
Daya was upset.

*****
After Pebbles got out of the vet, it was too late to paint but too early to call it a day so... I didn't really know what to do with myself.
I felt too scrambled to paint.

I tried taking a nap.
I contemplated going out but the timing didn't seem worthwhile.
Then I saw my friends were online so I just stayed in and played my game with my friends, and it took my mind off things.

*****
Isis gets really mad when Pebbles comes back from the vet.
I think it is the smell of the vet office... it turns Isis all wild and mean and growly.

Isis was so pissed off she didn't even eat lunch!

I had a chat with her.

I said "You didn't go to the vet, and you didn't pay for it, so what's your problem?"
She just sat in the window and glared at me.

105- Critiqued!

I got to 105 studies before I called it quits.
I probably spent about 5-6 hours on this homework.
It's quite tedious to do, unfortunately.

But I got them in on Thursday, and.... critiques are out this morning,  and.....my critique was pretty good!

After seeing everyone else's up there... I was feeling unsure, but Will Weston pointed out several that he says are successful. And also mentioned again he had to do thousands of them, and it takes time and practice.

So I'm glad I had several successful ones for my first time doing it. :)
I was getting a little confused between actual values of the frames vs depicting negative space, but I suppose ideally it's both at the same time. They are supposed to be pretty abstract silhouettes, not "nice drawings".  Graphic silhouettes. Simple.

Tomorrow I will have class again and another pile of homework.
Probably more film studies but with three values, which I will enjoy a lot more than just black/white.

*********
Yesterday I was off, I painted in the morning and volunteered at Manhattan Youth Ballet in the afternoon. It was good to get out.

Today I have to take Pebbles to the vet. Then I'll hopefully get out painting, if it isn't raining.

Synchronized Napping

Nap time.
Someone asked me once if my home is big enough for three cats.

Yes, my bed is big enough.

Weds Drawing

 We drew Elya while listening to Charles Dickens.

Graphite.

20 mins

1 hourish

I am in Homework Hell

I knew the Will Weston class would be homework hell but it is..... really homework hell.

The amazing thing is I did this to myself on purpose.

Honestly it reminds me a lot of being back at Pratt. the pace is definitely the college-level pace which makes sense because this is the stuff WW teaches at Art Center.

So I'm basically doing an Art Center class in Entertainment Arts but without the college credit for it.

I should have started the homework yesterday (or even Sunday night) but I did not because I procrastinate and now I am stressing.  Homework is due by Thursday for Sunday class.  That's the hard part. The time crunch.

AND last night I almost-finished my first painting for the series I'm doing with Carey.  

It needs to dry before I finish it.

AND ALSO I have this thing called an Actual Job that I have to.....do work for.

Here is my first page of film studies, there are 35 of them and this page took me 2 hours.

I have....... 165 more to go......................

Central Park: The Mall

Here is a painting from Central Park, at The Mall:

This was an... interesting but good.... painting experience. 

It evolved on it's own.

I had very good communication with this painting and it was definitely a departure for me, different than I expected, but I'm happy with it and I learned a lot.

I also got to test out my new oil-primed linen panels... I LOVE them.

Central Park was AMAZING today. The weather, the energy, all of it.  AMAZING.

The park was well-populated.  The pictures were carefully selected without too many people.

I painted under a tree in which the Squirrel of Judgement had a significant stash.

I was supposed to do some dance-mom volunteering after painting in the park but I flubbed up both the time AND the location.

But this awesome sign is on display in Lincoln Center... I love all the signs of care and positivity I see around the city.

LaGuardia is doing a Fame 40th Anniversary thing.

The dancers were invited to come dance at Bethesda Fountain to be filmed for the production.

Daya participated.

I did not take these pictures because I was slightly south of Bethesda Fountain painting, but my friend Alice sent them to me.

DISCLAIMER: Daya thinks these pictures are terrible.

Honestly, the whole LaGuardia experience feels detached and surreal in these Covid times... seems like it was 5 years ago Daya went through auditions and acceptance.... but while the school has, IMHO, MAJOR issues that are coming out from covid, the dance department is absolutely incredible and I am floored with gratitude each day that my child is part of such a special group.