Move|NYC Summer Showcase

This weekend Daya danced in three shows for the Move|NYC summer showcase, which is the culmination of the intensive she has been in for the last three weeks.

Their intensive is, as Nigel says- an intensive, not a "moderate". 

The kids were in class from 8:30am to 6pm --- and often later--- six days a week!!

They have a very small program and there are only 6 seniors this year, which is good for Daya, she'll get a lot of attention.

The show was, as it always is, mind-blowing.

I don't know how anyone can physically do what these kids do.

It was better than a few professional dance performances I have seen.

Daya danced her senior solo for the first time on stage.

It was choreographed by Norbert De La Cruz III and she has been working on it since last March or April.

It was breathtaking.

I do not have a video.

I am obnoxiously proud of her!

The kids get professional headshots and do aspirational resumes.

No one who isn't in the dance world would know anyone on Daya's resume under training, but anyone in the professional dance world would know them.  

She's got some pretty famous people (in the dance world) on there.

Deborah Wingert came to the 2pm performance just to see Daya's solo... she LOVES Daya!! 

I was so happy she came to support Daya.

Daya and Ms Chanel

Daya, Nigel, and Chanel

Me & Daya

AUGUST STRIKES AGAIN

Oh, it did.

I was upset.

Parents and families can purchase well-wishes to go in the program for the kids.

This is Daya's senior year so it's important for me to do this.

I got a half-page in the program and wrote her a really nice note.

When I submitted, I got an error message.

Just in case the payment went through, I wanted to verify before re-submitting.

move got back to me pretty quickly and said my submission was successful on the backend.

Phew!

But.... it was not in the program.

Nor was it in the digital QR code version of the program.

I spoke to them about it before the start of the 2pm show, and showed the email.  They apologized and said they would try and get it on the QR code for the next day (Sunday).... but.... no, it wasn't there.

Apparently it didn't go through after all.

I was pretty sad abut it.

They handled it well though, and in the February showcase they are giving me a full page for well-wishes.

Stupid August.

I might need to go back to Pigeon Risk Time.

Plein Air Finished by Thunderstorm

I have the day off work today, and I decided to get out of the city and maybe take a trip up to Cold Spring and paint.

But the weather forecast indicated maybe that was a bad idea.

Mid-day thunderstorms.

NOPE.

I went to the Long Island City waterfront instead, because it has been on my list of places to paint.

It was so hot and muggy and I had trouble focusing, but at least I showed up.

8x16 oil

I guess the thunderstorm was good timing, because it started right when I gad to call the painting done.

It was also earlier than the forecast said...  I thought I had another hour!

I have worn out 2 of my workhorse brushes again as well........

The rain started, I packed up really quickly, got drenched and headed home.  

The storm lasted about 10 minutes but was vey intense rain.

All My Spoons Are Gone

I'm really annoyed.

I don't care that it is a small thing I'm feeling annoyed and pissy that all my small teaspoons are GONE.

I have service for 8 and there are...... THREE.

Since Daya is in the Move intensive I'm the one doing the dishwasher-- almost every day... and I have seen a definite decline in spoons.

She's the one taking them out of the apartment.

So how am I NOT supposed to think they aren't coming back somehow????

This pisses me off I guess because it's a control thing.... I want my stuff where it belongs an flatware belongs in the apartment IN THE KITCHEN. And I just want my stuff to stay HERE.

And YES I have provided Daya with one of those sets of travel flatware!!

And all Daya says is she always brings it back.

SO WHERE ARE MY SPOONS???

If you are laughing fuck you.

I'm not laughing. 

If your kitchen started missing basic items that you use and need that are part of your kitchen you wouldn't be happy either. Especially when someone else is involved who doesn't give a shit about your stuff. And you're the one maintaining everything and providing everything and you can't even get a damn spoon in your own kitchen.

UPDATE: 2 missing spoons recovered, one in the coconut oil, the other in the cocoa powder.

I don't know where the rest are.

I do know I'm not the one who removed them from the apartment.

August Strikes Again

AAAARGH in a morning meeting today the global head of our team announced he is leaving.

I'm happy for him but really bummed...... he's one of the best leaders I have ever worked with.

This brings change...... I mean, it's just what happens in corporate and it will be ok but it's still a bummer.

Furball's Dental

Today was a really stressful day.

Furball had a dental appointment, and I almost couldn't get her there.

She's the sweetest cat in the world, but she has an instant panic-terror reflex that kicks in at absolutely nothing.

After her last vet visit she stopped eating pill pockets as treats, which meant I had to give her a sedative by force.  I almost could not do it.

I can't medicate Furball. She's too freaky and panicky.

After the third attempt I said a desperate prayer for help, wrapped her in a towel, and knew I only had one chance... and I got 2 pills in her at once, with difficulty and a huge scratch on my neck.

About 2 hours later I took her to the vet, she was terrified, and left her for her dental.

She needed SIX extractions.

OMG.

I told the vet do everything, this is our one chance.

The bill came to $1400, and Furball got a pinkiller shot that lasts 4 days and has her high as a kite.

I'm really glad this is over and done...... so between Furball and Pebbles I now have 2K in vet bills.

Fuck August.

A Sunday Plein Air

Today I have been doing a whole bunch of nothing, but especially since I didn't paint yesterday, I thought  really should get out today.

I couldn't decide where to go, but I didn't want to go far.

I thought maybe I should go to Long Island City and paint the waterfront; I have been wanting to do t hat fra while.

But I didn't feel up to the train trip.

Than I thought I should walk over to Flushing Meadows and paint some trees or something nature-ey.

That was the plan, except I got on the train and went to Forest Hills and painted the church instead.

So much for plans.

This painting took about 3 1/2 hours.

It was so hot and muggy, I was so ready to be done with this painting.

I forgot the yellow streetlight!!

Sometimes I forget things I mean to put in.

Oh well. It happens.  

I'm not adding it in, this painting is DONE.

A lady from the Queens Chronicle actually stopped her car and got out to come say hi!

She posted this on Instagram:

Someone on Instagram sent me a DM asking about the composition- if I left the right-side cross out on purpose or was it a mistake?

My answer: on purpose. Very intentional.

I originally had it in the drawing but then everything got too small and there was a street sign in an unfortunate position that I wanted to avoid. Besides, this painting is not about 2 crosses.  It is about the restaurant and the flags and the church.

I didn't mind explaining this, and in truth I spent a lot of time on the composition.  I walked to several spots for the stretch of one block, and I even used my viewfinder!

Could this painting have been about 2 crosses? Sure, yes, but it would change the whole composition and it was my decision what to put in there.  I really liked the flags.  It would be a better painting with the yellow streetlight but oh well!!!!

Everything can't be important and this is a lot to put in an 8x10.

How I Am Terrible at Life & Pretzel the Pier 101 Pet Bird

Today I went to Governor's Island to volunteer at Pier 101 and also to hopefully paint.

It takes me about an hour to get to the ferry.

I gave it 1 hour 20 mins this morning.

I missed the ferry by EXACTLY one minute.

It left at 10:40.

I got there at 10:41.

There was nothing to do but wait 40 minutes (!!!) for the next one.

When I got to Governor's Island there was a kids' scooter someone had left for anyone to take for free.

I decided it needed a marketing campaign.

My marketing campaign was wholly unsuccessful.
Kedrin suggested I give it even more color.

It attracted this gull.

I named him Pretzel.

He is our official Pier 101 pet.

Sometimes I am just not very good at life.... missing the ferry by ONE MUNITE... and my marketing campaign only attracted one hungry seagull.

I ended up not painting- although my intention was to leave the boathouse by 2pm.
But it got really busy and I just couldn't leave Kedrin all alone to run the desk.

We were very short-staffed today.

So once again I schlepped all my painting gear around just to schlepp it back, unused.

Kayak Sunset

Tonight was a wonderful day to just go sit on the water, the sunset was beautiful.
Photos don't do it justice.

This is such a nice way to end the week.

My friend Jaime, who joined tonight, took this picture of me.

The Unplanned Tuesday

You know how you think your day will go but it doesn't?

That was today.

Today was supposed to be my nice peaceful back-at-home-and-work day.

Daya is out all day at Move|NYC intensive, six days a week.  

She leaves at 7:15am and comes home a little after 7pm.

She called me around 11am.

Something is wrong with her foot.

It started yesterday afternoon.

Not better today.

Hurts to put pressure on it.

She's scared she has a stress fracture and wants imaging.

I do not think it is a stress fracture because it only hurts when she puts weight on it.

Fractures hurt ALL THE TIME and are pretty excruciating.

So I spoke to Nigel and he said she could be excused for the day and go to CityMD to rule out a stress fracture, which he also did not think it was. Daya needs to start handling this stuff the way a professional dancer would handle it.

Nigel did say all the kids are like this, they can't tell the difference between minor discomfort and I broke my leg.

That is Daya, emotionally too.

It is one thing after another after another after another after another and I never get a break from this neverending stream of problems.

Remember, Daya is on-track to go professional with dance, and physical pain is part of that package.  She needs to learn how to deal with it from a very different perspective. So, I did not go get her, I confirmed she is physically able to get from there to here, and left her to it.

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So Daya came home and we went for imaging.

I was not allowed to take a picture of her feet but I really wanted to.  

Her dancer feet are something else.

I hate how unfriendly Daya is to me. All the time.

We could have so much fun if not for that.

We had a bit of a fight while waiting for xrays, and it was a stupid one.

Nigel said Daya probably should have PT for this if there is no fracture.

PT again.

We just did PT and MRI for her hip.

I don't even know when Daya CAN go to PT, she's in dance all day every day.

It is a scheduling nightmare. She'll have to work it out.

City MD will NOT give a PT prescription, they said we have to get that from the orthopedist. (We have one.) Ok, fine. I get that.

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Anyhow.

I have finally met my out-of-pocket maximum for all of Daya's in-network medical expenses.

Now, I don't even have a co-pay anymore because I have paid out cash and maxed out my payment responsibility through my health insurance.

That should give you some idea of how much cash I have been paying towards Daya's medical in a relatively short amount of time. A lot of it was end of May through June.  All at once. We are talking thousands in cash from January.

AND I have to pay 100% for contact lens fitting plus contacts because insurance doesn't cover that at all.

So now, I absolutely REFUSE to pay medical if I don't have to.
And as long as a provider is in my insurance network, I don't have to. (For her.  I still have to pay for me.)

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So, back to PT.

There is a physical therapist in Brooklyn who helps the Move kids sometimes at a discount.

Of course Daya thinks she can ONLY see him.

I told her she can see him only if he'll see her without an rx AND insurance will cover it.

Otherwise we'll go back to Dr Han and get a PT prescription if needed.

(And City MD said ..... she needs an MRI.)

Daya got so ... angry.

She said I lied to her because I have told her she will get the care she needs and don't worry about the money.

And that IS still true.

She HAS gotten the care she needs, and will continue to receive it, and there is no worry about the money because it is covered. It just might not be the exact person she wants. Which in her mind means she isn't getting the care she needs.

We are going through this same stupid thing AGAIN.

But she is mad because if the Brooklyn PT person doesn't take my insurance, I'll say no let's see someone else.

Somehow this translates into me lying to her about providing the care she needs???

Look I know this is just a teenager reacting who has no context of How Life Really Works but it really sucks to be providing everything and being treated like this. I think I do an excellent job of providing excellent care and support to this child.

I don't like this nastiness, I don't like being yelled at, I certainly don't like being told I'm lying to her about providing medical care. This way of twisty-interpreting in Daya's mind is why she has so much anger towards me, and it isn't isolated to this particular incident. She doesn't understand how life works and won't hear anything other than what she thinks (knows). 

I need to be more like my friend Sharon- this kind of teenage stuff doesn't bother her at all.

But the things that bother Sharon don't bother me at all, like Daya's room being a mess.

I just don't care.  At all.

It really bothers me though, I hate it and it's this big heavy thing that is present all the time.  I hate living with someone who is always just so hostile and her reasoning behind it is crap like I mentioned above.

It really affects me. I try and offset it, and to an extent I do, but denying it probably isn't healthy either.

It just feels so.... unjust... to me.

What's the balance there in trying not to be so affected but acknowledging I'm really affected?

How do I not be affected and is that really the right answer?

Yes she sporadically sees a (very good) therapist but it doesn't help.

I kind of wonder if Daya is one of those people that therapy doesn't help.

I have no solutions.  Nothing works.

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Here are Daya's wonderful feet.

I wish I could show you how they look on the outside, too.

Dancer feet have such a visual story.