Monday

I have so many posts to catch up on.
Literally since September, I still need to put pictures from the medieval faire in September on here.
There are lots of posts I have draft-marked but haven't put together, lots of things I want to track here but I can't make myself do it.

Anyhow.

I was on vacation last week and Ellen came to visit NYC and it was Thanksgiving and Daya had Laguardia audition and callback and a birthday. Oh, and i need to put 2 paintings and Sid's visit here too.

More on all that later.

Anyhow I'm back from vacation and I'm still in a bad weird funk. And I'm glad to be back to work from vacation.

I couldn't get myself to do anything- not even paint- over vacay. Maybe the holidays are getting to me, my neighbors upstairs are still blasting and I'm messed up and trying not to be messed up from it (last night was really bad, I'm so upset), maybe I am stuck in my life being in the same job, same place, same everything and same nothing for so long.  But I don't want to move and I don't want to change jobs because they are both good situations..... I'm in a bad rut of same-old.  Same old for so many years and my life feels stale.  I need new energy, new people, and that is so difficult to find right now because of schedules and everyone's life is full.

So I rearranged my furniture and I hated it so I moved it back for the most part and it is a little different and ok, I guess.

I don't feel like doing anything.  I haven't felt like doing anything for a while.
Being at work is actually a relief.

****
Over the last couple of weeks I have been thinking to work more with Buddhism.
I love Buddhist teachings and practices, and truly I think the basic practices are some of the most direct systems that actually work to really, truly deal with our minds and life with practical teachings/applications. And it is compatible with pretty much everything. Not in a religious way, but in a back-to-basics way.

So I have been incorporating that a bit, and I think I need to expand my focus on it.

Buddhism teachings would say my awful upstairs neighbors are my great teachers and I should thank them for being awful so I can learn patience, learn, and strengthen my practice.

This is very difficult.  :/

There are some Buddhist centers here in the city and I am going to see what I can find.
I have been looking but it is a little hard right now because of conflict with Daya's dance schedule because I do have to pick her up in the evenings.  But I'll keep looking.

Next year, especially if she goes to high school for dance, my schedule will open up considerably.
But the Buddhist community here is something I think I need to explore.  I need some help that Buddhist practice can assist with, and it might also be a good place to meet high-quality people.

Here is a nice video I found today.