A Whole Lot of Utah Landscape 1

I took a ridiculous amount of landscape pictures in Utah.

It is too much for one post so I am breaking it up.

Click any image to enlarge.  :)

A Letter from the FBI

So, I got this email.

Absolutely NOTHING is more real and genuine than this letter.  I had better pay attention.

**************

From: "Mr James B Comey"
Date: June 15, 2015 at 3:40:34 PM MDT
Subject: Federal Bureau of investigation (FBI)

OFFICIAL LETTER FROM FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION FBI
EXECUTIVE DIRECTOR FBI FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION
FBI.WASHINGTON DC.
Mr. James B. Comey


FBI SEEKING TO WIRETAP INTERNET


OMG it is official


ATTENTION: Beneficiary,

Wow! I am a generic beneficiary!

We the Federal Bureau of investigation (FBI) through our intelligence monitoring network has discovered that the transaction that the bank contacted you previously for was legal.

I has discovered you are the Best Ever! Unless my intelligence monitoring network (aka Spam folder) failed...surely not.

Recently the fund has been legally approved to be paid via United Bank of Africa Nigeria.

Definitely legal.

So, we the Federal Bureau of investigation (FBI) Washington Dc,

Yeah I forgot where the FBI is headquartered. Thanx for the reminder!

in conjunction with the United Nations (UN) financial department have investigated through our monitoring network noting you that your transaction with the UBA Bank of Nigeria is legal.

Even more legal if stated more than once.

You have the legitimate right to complete your transaction to claim your fund $4.7 (four million seven hundred thousand united state dollars)

It is like playing the lottery without playing!

Because of so much scam going on internet.

Yes so much scam. A damn shame isn't it!

We the Federal Bureau of investigation decided to contact the NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE in Lagos, Nigeria for them to give us their procedures on how to send this money to you without any further complain or delay.

Awesome! I like NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE! They are way better than FedEx.

We just got an information from the Zenith Bank and they have loaded your $4.7 (four million seven hundred thousand united state dollars) in ATM MASTER CARD and submit to the NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE for immediate delivery to your doorstep.

Cool!! An information like that is not to be ignored!

You are required to choose one option, which you will be able to pay and also convenient for you, for quick delivery of your parcel containing your ATM CARD and other two original back up documents.

Not one but TWO ORIGINAL backup documents!

Service Type | Delivery Duration | Charges/Fees
------------------------------ ------------------------------
Premium Express (24hrs Delivery)
Mailing $200.00 00.00
Insurance $150.00 00.00
Vat $100.00 00.00

TOTAL $450.00

$450(Four Hundred and fifty US Dollars Only).

Yes please I want this one. 
Those extra zeros were to keep me thinking, I do appreciate that.

........................... .............................. ..........
Special Express (2 Days)
Mailing $180.00 00.00
Insurance $70.00 00.00
Vat $150.00 00.00
TOTAL $380.00 00.00

$380 (Three Hundred and Eighty US Dollars Only).
.............................. ..............................

I chose that first one.

Economy Express (3Days)
Mailing $100.00 00.00
Insurance$150.00 00.00
Vat (5%) $50.00 00.00

TOTAL $300.00 00.00

$300 (Three Hundred US Dollars Only).

Please see first choice already selected.
.............................. .............................. ........

You are hereby required to advice us, on your parcel delivery option by filling in the required form stated above.

I adviced you! :)

Please note that the deadline for claiming your fund is exactly 48 hours after the receipt of this
email. After this period, your fund will be return back so take note.

Moreover, this is some tracking number of beneficiaries that received their payment through us and via northehills website (www.northehills dot com/home).

A real website!

We request that you reconfirm your mailing address to ensure conformity with our record for immediate dispatch of your parcel to you. Only valid residential/Office address and postal address are certified Ok.

Ok!


DELIVERY DESTINATION INFORMATION:
------------------------------ ------------------------------ -
Receiver's Name: .......
Address: ................
Tel/: ...................

Delivery Information/ Parcel Description
------------------------------ ------------------------------ -----------
Delivery Terms: International Delivery
Condition of Delivery: Priority Delivery
Consignment Note No: MI 49866-2110
Color of Parcel: ...Brown.
Total Weight: 2.1 kg
Total Net Weight: 1.7 kg

The parcel is brown! I shall look for a brown parcel!

We are here to protect you from any problem till you receive your package;

I do need protection, thanks! 
Will you protect me from any problem after I receive it, too?

you can as well get in touch with the NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE assigned to deliver this financial package to your doorstep. Below is the delivery company's contact information:

Companies Name: NORTHEHILLS COURIER DELIVERY SERVICE .
Directors Name: Sir. Scott Nelson

Sir? Cool!

Email: mrscott_nelson at yahoo.com

OMG you Yahoo!

Looking forward to hear from you as soon as you receive this message.

Best Regards,
Mr. James B. Comey.
Federal Bureau of Investigation
J. Edgar Hoover Building
935 Pennsylvania Avenue,
NW Washington, D.C.
20535-0001, USA

Aww thanks! xoxoxo

**********
WHAT I WANT TO KNOW:
1. Is anyone receiving such an email really that stupid?
2. Why are these kinds of emails STILL circulating?  Is it because they worked at some point?
3. Is anyone receiving such an email really that stupid?
4. Why didn't my intelligence monitoring network pick this up?

Come to think of it, I should have returned all those Publisher's Clearing House mailings back in 25 years ago. Damn.

*********
TRUE STORY: When I was a kid, way back in the pre-internet days, I answered the phone one evening.  A man was on the other end, informing me all about the Canadian Lottery.

I kept him on the phone for about a half hour, leading him on, because he had a really funny accent.

The Cana-di-en Lott'ry!  It's the BEST IN THE WOR-LED!

When I told him, after letting him go on for a half hour, that we weren't interested, he got REALLY pissed off.

HAHAHA

We Need Black Color Charts

Of course we do.  Well, I do, anyhow.

I'm going to do..... something.....involving working on black in July.  Naturally, this means I need to make color charts on black in my sketchbook.

Black Colorfix Primer is AWESOME in your sketchbook.  Black gesso would work too, but I really love the Colorfix surface. The primer surface is the same as Colorfix paper, so it is like turning your sketchbook pages into Colorfix paper, which is absolutely brilliant.

 Derwent Graphitint (water-soluble)

I like Graphitint pencils quite a lot, and I have been using them in my sketchbook for the last few years. They are really strange pencils, and that might be why I like them so much. They are definitely graphite in look and feel, but they are tinted.

They look very different against black compared to white.

 Derwent Drawing Pencils, 24

I saw this set at Blick a few days ago, and they were priced in the $50 range, which I did not want to pay. Amazon (Prime!!) had them for $27.50.  Lee's Art Shop- which I am convinced really is closing, despite cryptic answers from the cashier- has this exact same set for... $64.99!!  Whoa!! No wonder they are going under.

Anyhow, they are all wonderful earth colors, and they are very soft and smooth.  Get them, but definitely not from Lee's. Eek.

 Derwent Inktense Blocks, 24 (water-soluble)

This is one of the sets i got in Utah.

Derwent Graphitint XL (water-soluble)

These Derwent XL blocks are seriously COOL. Both the Graphitint and the Charcoal.

Derwent Charcoal XL(water-soluble)

Derwent Metallic Pencils (water-soluble)

!!!! I did not realize the metallic pencils are water-soluble until I did the color chart
and it was the best discovery EVER.

Perhaps I have mentioned before that I am a huge fan of Derwent pencils and Derwent everything. There are many good pencils out there, but Derwent is my Urban Decay of pencils, I guess. 

I occasionally have brand loyalty. It is good because it reigns me in a bit.

Interference

Not only am I a color junkie, but I have no resistance for anything interference.
Especially paint.......

Here are my Golden interference colors.
(I have a few more but they are in little jars, because they do not come in the tubes for some reason. They really should.  The green-violet is fabulous.)

 They are wonderful and glowy and iridescent and I love them madly.

********
In other news, TODAY IS THE LAST DAY OF 4th GRADE!!!!!

One more year of Elementary School.....

It is inconceivable.

Disturbed Sunny Habitats

In Utah, there are these GIANT dandelion-looking flowers. Of course I love them.
For some reason, I have never seen them here in NYC.  They really need to be in NYC.

Apparently they are "wild salsify, a species of Tragopogon."

They live in "disturbed sunny habitats."

Disturbed sunny habitats.

We are most definitely disturbed here, and it is sunny quite a lot.  So I think the salsify would do quite well here.

As a gracious act of community service, I have gathered and smuggled many salsify seeds across the country, and I am in the process of scattering them around many places. Hopefully they will take root and hopefully NYC will be populated with GIANT dandelions.

You're welcome.

Macro Salsify

Speedo Veto

This past weekend I set up Daya's aquarium again.  It has been dormant for way longer than I meant for it to be...

So I cleaned it out and filled it and put all the stuff in the right places and put the right stuff in the water and then we went and got her some new fishies.

She got some glow-fish and tetras and some green and black stripey fish.  I don't know what they are but everyone can live with each other in peace and love and harmony and they all have a same-species BFF.

Daya loves her fishies and she had to name them, of course.

She named them:
*Moonlight
*Sonata
*Stripey
*Striper
*Speedy

....and.....

*Speedo.

I immediately vetoed Speedo.  The fish is now named Caffeine.

Speedo is not a good fish name,
swimwear non withstanding.

Caffeine is a very good fish name.

Fish are hard to photograph.

Softness Controls Strength

In martial arts, one learns about strength- both outer and inner. The more damage you are capable of inflicting, if you have learned properly, the softer you will be in your approach. You have to know when to unleash hell. There had better be a good reason to cut someone down. You learn to control it,

There is enormous strength and power behind a gentle approach. Behind living a gentle life. It is much more difficult to maintain a gentle spirit, especially in such an aggressive society. Especially with aggressive people.

We see this in the Tarot, in the Strength card. This card is usually depicted as a woman sitting with a lion, calm and peaceful. There is no struggle, no force.

Legacy of the Divine Tarot

I, myself, can be a forceful person. I can have an aggressive edge to my personality.  And this is just fine. I have had to fight tooth and nail just to get through, to survive. But I strive to have a gentle spirit. That doesn't mean I am weak- quite the opposite- I am very, very strong. But there is immense power and strength in a gentle spirit, especially a spirit that already knows how to fight with force.

It is important to balance the stresses of life with gentle activities. Yoga, arts, meditation, watching the sunset...things that nurture the soul.

People are not gentle with each other. We should be. The world would be a much better place if we were. Have compassion for the next rude and angry person you encounter. Remember Newton's 3rd Law "For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction." Change the energy dynamic- be kind and compassionate. Make someone laugh who seems to be having a bad day. That is the hand and voice of God working through you. Allow it.

Love requires immense strength. Here is the timeless good reminder, good words to guide us in how to love each other and ourselves better, with more grace and wisdom.

Forgive

When I am upset, it takes a while for things to move through me.

I am still reeling from what my friend did last week. I wish I could just turn off feelings, but I have to allow them to pass naturally, and that can take a while, depending on the situation. It is unpleasant but it is what it is.

Jesus said,
"Forgive them for they know not what they do."

And that applies here.  People are often completely unaware of the repercussions of their words and actions. My friend hurt me very deeply in ways she just could never know about.  Could she have handled things differently?  Yes, certainly.  What she did was wrong.  And I am not required to lay out my innards just for someone else to feel justified in being compassionate.

Although telling her didn't help much.  And it has absolutely nothing to do with her whatsoever. It isn't her business. And it also isn't the end of the world, or anything even close to being so dire.

Were her intentions good? Yes. But that doesn't mean it wasn't harmful in the way it was carried out. The way in which things are done can be more harmful than helpful, so be careful when "helping" without the other person's knowledge or consent. And if that "help" comes with a heavy hand of judgement and condemnation, you are definitely NOT helping no matter what.

When we love people, we must love them for who they are- issues and all.  Dark spots and failures. My friend has her own dark spots and failures, too, but I have never judged her for it, because I know we are all dealing with our own challenges in life, and what is easy for one person is an un-surpass-able mountain for someone else. And we are all just doing our best.

Ideally, I would like for people to extend the same compassion and non-judgement that I offer them, but I also know that not everyone has arrived at that point yet. They don't know any better.  They cannot go past their own filters.  And that is exactly why I have to forgive, and realize we are all on this life journey to learn.

The most powerful thing is to love someone in their dark places that need the most love.
Most people don't do this; they just judge.

"A friend is someone who knows you and likes you anyway."

*****
All this aside, I am still hurting. Quite badly. Forgiveness does not make the hurt go away.  I will just have to let my heart heal in its own time, and carry on.  But I might be even more cautious than I already am about letting people too close, or trusting that my closest people will still love me, failures and all.

Solstice

Here we are at another Solstice.  Midsummer.  The Longest Day.
A turning point in the natural cycle of the earth.  And we also come into the watery sign of Cancer.

To be very exact, the solstice happens here in NYC at 12:39 PM EDT.

I like to pause and reflect during the solstice- both of them. These last six months have been challenging. I arrive at the Summer solstice with less than I had at the Winter solstice, and I feel sad about that.

But I have crossed landscape and mountain and river. I have traveled to new places- three of them- in the last six months. Three good places.  Perhaps those good energies are now a part of me, perhaps some of that goodness will see me forward to the next solstice.

**********
Mo wrote in his column last week about Newton's 3rd Law:

"For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction."

For every action there is an equal and opposite reaction. 

That includes being kind to others and sharing the joy of being alive on this planet.

Share your love and life easily and without hesitation 

and the Universe will embrace you with the same. 

I’m absolutely certain of it.

I sure hope so, Mo.  I could really use some good Life Vibes.

*********
It is a good time to draw a new Tarot card from the Major Arcana. And a new color.  Red has been my color, but now I am going to switch to blue, because that just feels right.

I am using the Legacy of the Divine Tarot by Ciro Marchetti.  This is a really interesting and beautiful deck, and I will likely be working with it during July. How, I am not sure yet.

My card, which jumped out of the deck, is Judgement.
How very apt.

Key concepts for this card are redemption, atonement, the end of a journey, resurrection, closure, renewal, rebirth, reward, realizing the consequence of action, transformation.

That is really interesting in several ways, such as:
1. What I have literally just experienced in being judged
2. It follows my card of last Winter Solstice, which is a waiting kind of card.

This is one of the reasons I love tarot so much; it speaks on such deep and relevant levels.

Those Suspicious Artists

First things first.

Wireless Mouse Update:
It is hardly a surprise that I was unclear about my wireless mouse USB transmitter thingy, Let me clarify.

I did not bring my computer or my wireless mouse or the very tiny USB transmitter thingy to Carey's.
My USB transmitter thingy was plugged into my desktop as it always is, and the mouse was working just fine when I left, because using it to shut down my puter was the very last thing I did before leaving home to go to Carey's. When I came home it was gone and my nice purple wireless mouse would not work.

????????????

This is a situation that is too baffling and complex for me, so the only solution was to go buy a new wireless mouse. My spare mouse is too crappy to use for anything good, such as playing Skyrim.

*********
When I arrived in Utah, the first thing Carey and I did was buy art supplies.  Papers, to be exact. This wasn't planned, it just happened.

This is the nice paper I got. As you can see, it is black and lovely.

On my last day in Utah we also bought art supplies.  I am extremely excited about my Blick clean-up.

1. Manikin pet kitty for my person-manikin who lives on my drawing table with topiary trees.

2. Derwent Graphitint Blocks (in a tin!)

3. Derwent Colored charcoal blocks (in a tin!)

4. Derwent Inktense blocks (in a tin!)  Carey has a set of these and they are wonderful and I needed them too.

5. Set of Derwent metallic colored pencils (in a tin!)

6. Erasers that look like colored pencils.  I asked Daya if she wanted them and she said no so that means they are mine.

SIDE NOTE: I LOVE Derwent pencils etc.  I only use Derwent because I like them.  They have been my go-to standard since high school.

Carey has these metallic pencils too, and she said they are perfect for the black paper I got.

It is so nice when things just work out perfectly like that.

This is, by far, the most important thing I got.

 MAGIC RAINBOW UNIKITTY!!!!!!!

Out of the shadows comes......

 PEBBLES THE UNICAT!

Every. Single. Time. I check a bag with paint gear inside, it gets physically inspected. While it is true that there were some definitely strange items in my suitcase, at least they all had proper context. ......Except for the giant dandelion seeds, the silkworm pods, the habanero sugar, and the black lava salt......

And I am extremely relieved that the TSA agents did not snack on my strawberry jalapeño jam.

Oh, Carey's art supplies are here, if you want to see them.  (Of course you do)

Sledgehammer

If you have to ask someone outright to be gentle and compassionate about something they don't understand or relate to, chances are that you will be unsuccessful.  Which is why you had to ask for compassion in the first place. But even then- ask and ye shall not receive. Do not expect it.

We all have our Deep Issues. None of us is perfect. I have some Deep Issues and I am not perfect.

But I try. I really do.  For the most part, I fail at life. I fail at pretty much all aspects of life, all the time. Even if I am really trying my best just to get through. Things are not always what they seem. It is not necessary to personally relate to something, or even understand it, to have compassion. You do not know what someone else is going through. What they have been through.

And when one of your nearest and dearest throws a sledgehammer at your soft spots- at what they KNOW are your soft spots, it is a crushing experience.  Especially when it is because they have been trusted, and they overstepped boundaries of their own accord without consent.

Being gentle and compassionate with someone is not the equivalent to sugar-coating something. Hearts are delicate and sometimes they need to be handled carefully. This is not something people understand, for the most part and it makes me want to stay far, far away from people in general.

The road to hell is paved with good intentions. You may have absolutely no idea what you are triggering in someone else, and how bad it can be.

Loving people, letting people close, requires vulnerability; it gives people the power to hurt or heal us. Please use that power wisely and responsibly.

Perhaps one of my lessons in being human, in evolving, is maintaining the ability to be compassionate when there is none available for me, especially when I need it.

I've Been Through the Desert on a My Little Pony (With No Name)

I have been in Utah with Carey for the last six (6) days. We got back home around midnight-thirty this morning.

Furball will not come out of hiding.  She might be upset.

Carey's cats are also upset, especially Kitty, because now no one will turn on the bathtub for him. Poor Kitty.

Kitty demands bathtub water, constantly

Inexplicably, my wireless mouse will not work and the remote USB transmitter thingy is missing. (????????) We did find one at Carey's and wondered where it came from, but I am positive it is not mine because the very last thing I did before leaving was shut down my puter.  With the mouse.

?????????????

There are no ponies in Carey's kitchen, ever.  

Nope.

Scooby-Doo spits out popcorn, for reals.

More Utah stuff tomorrow.  Because I am tired. And this post is going live in one hour and fourteen (14) minutes.

And if anyone has any clue about my wireless mouse USB transmitter thingy, please tell me because I just ..... I am completely, totally, and utterly at a loss.

??????????

Artisanal Rent Hikes

There is an Artisanal Rent Hike Sale going on in Boerum Hill. 

Boerum Hill is a nice neighborhood in Brooklyn. The hipsters think it is nice too.

Jesse's Deli, a neighborhood staple since 1983, is staring down a rent increase of about 150%, from $3,500 to $10,000, come July 1st. Pending some miracle, they'll have to give up their lease.

How could anyone keep up with rent increases like that?

It makes me ARTISANALLY ANGRY. 

How I Get Away with Anything

It's true, I can get away with anything,
I can explain away anything about myself that might be somewhat odd.

Such as but not limited to:

• chaotic apartment 
• ELECTRIC eye shadow 
• lack of good math skillz/outright refusal to do math 
• explanation of various things that may be floating in my purse (pencil sharpener, sometimes paint, sketchbook) 
• strange ideas 
• all the books 
• the assortment of oddities around my apartment (for still life, you never know) 
• my obsession with clouds 
• the seemingly un-associated tangents I go off on

All I ever have to say is, "I paint."

It always works.  Every time.

Black Swan

Jerry's came out with some new brushes earlier this year.

They are a new line called Black Swan- good for watercolor, oils, and acrylic.  I got the 15 brush set and have been using them for oils and acrylic.  They are WONDERFUL.  I love them.  I love them so much that I might switch over to them instead of the Simply Simmons brushes I have been loving for years.

Well, maybe I will stick with both.

I don't get expensive brushes because I wear them out- especially the flats and brights.  I do love a good sharp crisp bright.

Speaking of brushes..... when I went over to Da Vinci to look for the Oleogel that Lee's did not have, I got these!!

Three of those Rublevs I got for 40% off!

I love brushes.  Who would've guessed??

Talisman

I remember the 100th anniversary of the Statue of Liberty.  This was when I was still living in my hometown, Newtown, Connecticut. There was a celebration fair in town, and we got a flyer about it in school. Since I have always loved the Statue of Liberty, I wanted to go, and my father took me and my sister.

One of the small items for sale was a small 3" pewter statue.  It cost $5. I wanted one, and my father gave me the money and sent me over alone to buy it.  There was a child slightly older than me handling the table, and I gave him the money and took the figurine.  I guess he was confused about our transaction, because his mom called me back to figure out what had happened.  I told her I gave the money (which the boy confirmed).  She switched out my figurine with one under the table which was not the display item with a price tag stuck to it.  And all was sorted out and well.

I never made it to the Statue of Liberty as a child. My Girl Scout troop planned a trip, but I could not go because my mother decided to move us to Georgia. I was so very disappointed.

Over the years, this little pewter figure became a sort of secret personal talisman for me. I used to take it places with me, especially if I was travelling. And when I finally made it over to Liberty Island, it came with me.

These days, it lives on my house altar.

Storytelling

...there was a girl who was pregnant and clueless about being pregnant.  So she read the right books, but she didn't have any friends to talk to who had been through it.  She had no Real Life perspective. Because she couldn't talk to her mother about it, or her sister, or anyone, really. She wanted to go inside the minds of other women who were experiencing this crazy thing. She needed to find people to relate to, who understood.

So one day she decided to look up pregnancy blogs.  She found many interesting people.  She enjoyed reading about their experiences, their stories, and their lives in general.  They were Real People. Some of them had large, popular blogs.  Some did not. But they all had one thing in common- they were real stories about real people, about things that were happening right now.  They were direct, they were intimate. And each of them was a starting point to find other people who shared their stories, through links and comments.

And the girl learned more about pregnancy from the inside out from blogging than from anywhere else. She thought, "Their lives are so interesting." Sometimes she thought, "I wish my life was like that, too." Or, "I wish I had that." Or, "She is so fortunate and she doesn't even realize it." Sometimes they went through hardships, and she would empathize, and wait impatiently with them, and maybe say a prayer for them.

A few years passed and the girl was no longer pregnant. But she still read many of the same blogs, which continued after those women were no longer pregnant.  Some of them went on to have other children.  One day as she was reading one of those blogs, she had an insight, a revelation:

"These women have basically normal lives, just like most of us. 
They are neither different, nor more or less interesting than anyone else. 

What makes them interesting is that they know how to tell a story."

The girl realized that anything, however mundane, can be turned into a story. That there are stories all around us, if we know how to see them, in the same way that there are potential paintings all around us, at all times.

It is a little bit magical.

********

I don't mention my blog to many people I encounter in person.  But sometimes I do, and when I mention that I have been posting every day, a very common reaction is that their own lives are dull and boring, and they would not have anything to write about. They have nothing to say. I disagree. It is all about seeing what is around you. There is weird, quirky, odd stuff EVERYWHERE.

Like = Said

Common vernacular changes with the times.  It has always done so, in all places, in all languages. Sometimes it is for the better, sometimes not.

What I would really like to know is how the word "like" started equating with "said".

Here is a story-joke, and a good one, grammar and vocabulary aside:

They're like.  You're like.  He was like.  I was like. The cat will be like.

Stop and think about this for a second.

IT SOUNDS REALLY STUPID
(I am sure)

It is ubiquitous. "...was like..." is in every conversation, usually younger age groups (but not always), all groups of people.

Apparently, this use of the term has evolved from a Frank Zappa song!

And sadly, most of the people using it these days probably don't even know who Frank Zappa is.

Macro Flowers

Here are some flower pics I took in Connecticut with my macro lens.

This one is not taken with the macro lens

Perfect Timing!

Ah, the Universe takes care of us.

On Monday I went up to Lee's Art Supply to get some Oleogel for Carey.  Much to my dismay, they are discontinuing Rublev oils.  Why?  I think they are going out of business.  It looks a bit sparse in there. That's really too bad, it is a cool store.

All the Rublev was 40% off so I got a few tubes.

I love Rublev.

Rublev is a small brand and there are two (2) shops where it can be found in person here in NYC (that I know of).  One is (was) Lee's, the other is alllll the way downtown by Canal Street and I don't like Canal Street.  I'll go if I need to but I don't like it.

And then I got THIS EMAIL:





Da Vinci is conveniently located 15 minutes away from my office, and now they have Rublev!

Love!

To Share or Not to Share

I ran across an article recently that discusses kids, sharing, and teaching kids to share.
Or not, in this case.

Here is the full article.

It is about a post written by a lady named Beth.

“I think it does a child a great disservice to teach him that he can have something that someone else has, simply because he wants it.” I think she’s right. Teaching anyone that they should be able to have what someone else has simply because they want it isn’t a mentality I think should be spread around. But it begs the question: how then do we define what is truly sharing?

1. Visitors
When kids go visit each other, they always want to check out the Cool and Different Stuff their friend has. And they are a guest- sharing needs to happen.  When Daya gets anxious about this, I tell her to pick one or two things BEFOREHAND that do not have to be shared.  And she never has to share Animal Blankie.

But aside from something she selected BEFOREHAND to not share, she has to share everything else and I am very clear about this up front.  This is enforced.

Daya generally does not mind sharing with people who are nice to her.  She does NOT like to share with people who are mean to her, bother her, or people she thinks will mess up her stuff.

And I think that is valid, but when she has company and has been in that situation, she has still has to share.  It isn't cool for someone to visit and not be able to play with anything.

2. Personal Property in Public
Daya does not have to share her personal property in public with strangers.

Sometimes Daya/stranger-kids borrow each others' things at the playground.  They ask each other and work it out and it is cool.

Daya does not like to share her things with classmates who she knows will not give it back.  Like the time she had a fight with a boy in her class who was being mean to her and she was mad at him for that, and he was mad at her because she wouldn't share her grey crayon.  Why not?  She knows he takes stuff and doesn't give it back. And that is valid.

3. Shared Public Property/Resources
The classic scenario- no one wants something unless someone else has it. The swings, rides, etc- these are shared public resources and sharing and turn-taking need to happen.

It is not cool for a child to monopolize something forever when others are waiting.  That's when parents should set some time limits and give others a chance.

And it is not fair when one child keeps something just because others want it- and let's not kid ourselves around, THEY DO THAT SOMETIMES.

Do Not Share This Ever

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I read something....somewhere, oh gosh I wish I could remember where it was from....it was a story about a place where a group of people lived, and absolutely everything was communal.  That was the law. And someone broke the law with something small that they kept to them self, simply because they had a strong need to have something that was just theirs.

This is a totally, completely, NORMAL part of being human. We need some stuff that is our Own Stuff. It extends to other people- for example, most of us prefer for our mates to not be shared.  I have plenty of stuff I do not share, and plenty of stuff I will happily share.  Learning to share/not share is about healthy boundaries.  You don't want your child to be a doormat, nor do you want them to be a miser. Sometimes we have to share, because we live together. Or resources are limited and should be available to everyone.

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Carey has a lot of sharing to coordinate.  Her thoughts are here.