Releasing Paintings

I released a painting and I'm sad about it.
I should not be sad about it, and I didn't think I would be.
Nor do I have any clue why I am sad about it.

Recital was yesterday and we raffle off stuff for fundraising.  I donated a painting...this one:

Dusk in Auridon
9x12 pastel

Someone named Paul bought a bunch of raffle tickets and was so! excited! about the painting-- I didn't meet him but one of the other moms told me.

And I love making other people happy with my art!

Releasing the painting was absolutely the right thing to do, some paintings need to go out into the world and it sure wasn't doing anything in my home.

Now it will be loved and appreciated and it made someone happy.
What is better than that?

So why is it surprisingly bittersweet?

When I start a painting that I know is destined to leave, I am never sad about releasing it.
I'm happy to do so.
I have sold paintings before that I didn't know would go when I painted them, and I wasn't sad about them either.  I was happy to see them go.

I do have paintings I will never sell, I think we all do.

And there isn't anything particularly personal about this painting.  It doesn't have any particular significance.  I knocked it out in 2 hours last December while on vacation.  It is from a screenshot from Elder Scrolls Online.

And before anyone says, oh just paint another- yeah I could but it is highly unlikely I will.
I don't make duplicates of my own work.  It doesn't feel right to me.  Besides, I already painted this image.  There are others waiting.

Being an artist is really weird.

(I asked Carey if she ever experienced this and she said yes.  Of course she understood.)