16 - 8 = 12

Daya says May is a bad month.  She has been saying this since May 2.
In April she was saying how May was going to be a GREAT month.... well, I guess it has time to turn around for her.

Her school is offering parkour after school Mondays from this week to June 11, and of course Daya wanted to sign up.  She went on Monday and had a blast...and by the time she got home she couldn't walk.

Which is kind of a problem.

Something had to be wrong, it isn't like Daya to be out of commission after physical activity.  But apparently she was landing jumps improperly from heights and the shock went all up her legs and she is in significant pain.  She knows what she did wrong and how to avoid it in the future, but in the meantime she has a lot of muscle shock.

This is a problem because she still has to dance and recital is in a few weeks.
I gave her 4 advil before class last night and told her she just has to get through it somehow.

When I picked her up after class she was distraught.  Crying.  Also in a lot of pain. Apparently Ms Shauna reduced a part of the dance- for Daya- from 16 turns to 8.  Daya decided it was a personal failure on her part.

The truth is that her series of 16 turns wasn't quite "there" last week either.  Even though Daya really has been practicing a lot, and she was excited about it.  But it is better to do 8 clean turns than 16 sloppy turns.

Still, Daya was distraught about it. She is taking it hard, but the truth is that she can't be doing that.

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Ms Shauna was nice enough to talk to Daya for a minute after class, and I'm glad I was there too.
This is where I had to remind Daya that she is only 12 years old- and dancing in a class with girls who are 14, 15, 16 years old.  At this age, that's a HUGE difference in development.  She can't really expect to be at the same developmental level as a 15 year old, even if they are in the same class.  So what if she can't pull off 16 clean turns- YET- she still gets to do 8.  This is very difficult stuff!! The fact that she's even IN the class- for the second year, too- is a major accomplishment in itself.

She is judging herself against girls who are older and have been dancing longer. She thinks she should be there too but the fact is that she's simply just too young to be there yet. 

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Just because a child is advanced in some areas doesn't mean they are advanced in all areas.  In general, kids who are advanced are also behind in other areas.  I'm not worried about it because it's just part of growing up, and again, she's only 12 years old-- no 12 year old is emotionally mature- but she'll be fine.  It's just a matter of time and age.

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The truth is that if Daya wants to pursue dance seriously, she has to toughen up emotionally.  So that's how I approach this stuff.  In that world, no one cares how you feel.  Seriously, no one cares.  People get moved all the time.  They get roles, they don't get roles, they get rejected, they have a role then lose it... that's what she is signing up for as a dancer.  You don't get to have an "off" day when performing. You don't get the luxury of emotion affecting performance.  Add a good amount of physical pain into that, and that's what being a dancer is about.

The irony is that if she was in Ms Shauna's place she would be exactly like Ms Shauna.

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There is a lot of cool stuff happening this month, so I hope Daya's legs stop hurting (she has to get through class tonight as well) and her mind flips around to better thoughts.