topiary cats

topiary cats

Thursday, January 19, 2017

At Least the Sun is Out Today

Sometimes things just need to be processed before they disappear.
I wish- seriously wish- that I could just think things away, dismiss them and they're gone, but life doesn't always work like that.

Today I'm not feeling great but since everything seems to have culminated it's all on the way out.  When I am feeling bad it just needs a little time.  I'll feel better in a day or two; I know how it goes. This is familiar ground.

Like splinters. it hurts before extraction, it hurts during extraction, and it hurts after extraction but it starts to go away.

My shoulder still hurts but less than yesterday.  Again, just like feelings, it slowly works its way out. I know it is stress-induced.

*******

I hear the owl in the night
I realize that some things never are made right
                                                -Indigo Girls


Here is something I have thought about a lot in...well, I-don't-know-how-long, Recent-ish time, a couple years perhaps.

As humans we are internal and external beings.
There are things we can physically observe (our bodies, etc) and things we cannot physically observe (thoughts, personality, emotions etc).

Sometimes it happens that a person has an ailment with their physical body- loss of limb, an injury, a disease- that causes chronic pain that- in truth- will never go away. It is something they will have to cope with for the rest of their life. It is, in a sense, easier to define because it is physically observable and measurable. There are also many unknowns about our physical makeup and what causes dysfunction.

Sometimes it happens that the internal non-physical structure of a person gets messed up. It could be genetic, It could be trauma, abuse, childhood situations which can impact a person for the rest of their life.  Something has happened on a core foundation level and everything else developing from there just has to make due the best it can, if it can.  If a tree grows crooked, for example, it can never be made straight. If a tree grows straight, it can never be made to bend.

Sometimes there are things that are missing which can never be replaced.  Or injuries that cause permanent change. And this may cause an internal chronic pain issue, such as depression. And depending on the source of the dysfunction, it can definitely be something that won't ever go away.

There are different ways to manage chronic pain issues, some better/more effective than others, but the point is that in these situations it may never go away and that is something to be looked at and accepted.

It doesn't mean a person is weak, and it isn't even a failing.
It just is what it is.

The point is that you can make huge efforts, good efforts and all you can do is manage something that will never go away.

3 comments:

  1. Yep. I have tendonitis in my foot that won't go away. Very painful. Annoying. I like to walk. Can't walk. A new way of life.

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  2. I can relate, on so many levels. Hugs to you Sweetie.

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  3. I totally understand what you are saying Jessica, when people can't see the internal scars, it doesn't mean they are not there... we need to have more empathy for each other... xox

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