topiary cats

topiary cats

Sunday, December 07, 2014

2014 Thoughts

Well it is December.  Again.

Here are the intentions I set for the year:

1. Drink a lot of tea DONE
2. Finish 1 studio painting per month (total 12 complete)
    -including 1 master copy (Memling)'    Ummmm........
3. Finish Through the Tarot in 78 days   Ummmmmmm.......
4. Fast 2 days a week DONE MOSTLY
5. Art reading: Color by Betty Edwards Oh yeah i remember that book......

My tarot card for the year was Ace of Pentacles.

Ace of Pentacles from the Mystic Dreamer deck

The Ace of Pentacles represents of new beginnings, fresh energy, and inspiration

Well, that didn't exactly happen.

I'm sorry for being so cynical these days, but that's just where I am.  As much as I don't like it and wish it was different, I can't help but be realistic.  I cannot ignore consistent outcomes. And the truth is that as much as we create our own reality by our thoughts, feelings, and reactions- we do not live in isolation.  We are all inter-connected.  The choices and actions of others DO have an impact on us. And when the same things happen over and over from unconnected sources over unconnected time periods, what conclusions can we draw?

  • Is it a fault within me?
  • Am I fighting a Life Path?
  • As much as I don't believe in punishment-just consequences-am I living out some kind of karma?
  • What is the message, what is the lesson?  I can see how I have learned and benefited to this point, but I don't see it going forward. I would like to move on.

Someone on my Guide Staff keeps telling me to read the story of Job.  I read it yesterday and I have to ponder my response.  I'm not too thrilled with Job to be honest.

It's nice being off Facebook.  Too many words and images and they all clatter around and I can't hear myself think or see my own visions.

1 comment:

  1. Back in New York over a decade ago when I was homeless and hadn't gotten SSI yet, my therapist (one of the 3 best I've ever had) said "Real dependence attracts codependents."

    That stuck with me ever since.

    It's not always your karma. It might be theirs. It might be the family or nation.

    A reader in New Orleans told me "Perhaps the lesson wasn't for you."

    Some things to remember. Truth is, bad things happen to good people and life gets hard. That does not mean you deserve it or that minor mistakes deserve insanely huge punishments. Or even that past life was sucky and now catching up to you. When you start doing active good, elping people, building good karma that's a better way of paying it off than suffering - or there is no point to the learning.

    Entropy is.

    Life is anti-entropic. When you strive against the challenges in life it strengthens all that's good. Everything is interconnected and sometimes you wind up being the icebreaker on the front of the ship, not the passenger in the cabin. Until you break.

    All stories end. Everyone dies. What happens in between is not solipsistic, we're all interconnected. But a reason to live well is that you're also making it better for all those you care about. Including those beings without language and money and tools who love you anyway or don't even know you but also deserve to live and have their habitat.

    Just some thoughts. I don't really go with Job because not monotheist and don't subscribe to the notion that the rich are better people than the poor and everything's fair when it's not. Loved your post on it though (reading posts backward).


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