topiary cats

topiary cats

Friday, April 04, 2008

Feeling Failure

I had a stern talk with myself a few days ago. Except it didn't seem to make much difference.

See, here's the thing- I am feeling like a dismal artistic failure, and it's all my fault entirely. It's all my fault because I am not producing any work!

Life is short. And I have a gift, an ability. I can draw, I can paint, the art thing is part of my core nature...and I'm doing NOTHING AT ALL with it!

The last painting I finished was over a year ago!

Do I blame having a toddler? Partially- it's hard to do much of anything when she's awake. Or is it more that I am lazy and unmotivated, even more than I am tired? I don't know. If I really wanted to I would, right? And I do want to, I just...don't.



  1. did you learn to do that??? I am surprised I had not seen this painting before...I have read fairly far back into your blog!!! You know...all different sorts of things keep us from doing what we think we should be doing. I think it is due to several things...tiredness...wanting to find a new place to live...busy.

    You thing that could help is rearranging your house! Sometimes that gets me going you a fresh perspective! Fling open the windows on a nice day, and let the breeze flow through the curtains, in your new art studio!!! Change things up a little bit...and have a picnic outdoors, and sketch. Do you ever visit Teri C's blog? She sketches wherever she goes, and then used watercolor to paint when she gets home...her stuff is really great. She does a cactus every monday too! Her blog is HERE. Maybe you could do portable art, while on the go!

  2. Julie, that's a great idea!

    Jessica, why not set up a special space for your art in your apartment? I found it so much easier when I did this because everything was at the ready whenever I felt the urge to paint. Before that, I used my dining table and, sometimes, the thought of having to get out all my paints and supplies to set up was a complete turn-off for me. Another thought would be to sketch or art journal to get those creative juices flowing again.

    You don't have to start with anything on a grand scale.....try something basic on ATC/ACEO cards, small format canvasses or simply just draw.

    Maybe set Daya up with her own little section and you can both create together? Aaron has been doing this with me for a few years now and he loves it.

    Your painting is absolutely beautiful and it seems such a shame that you haven't painted for a while. Your muse needs a good butt-kicking!!!

    I would highly recommend doing the course from The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron. This book has been like a bible to me and I plan to re-do the course for the third time and post about it regularly on my blog. Maybe you would like to do that too? It may help to keep you motivated.

    Try to make a habit of art on a daily basis to keep the momentum flowing. Commit yourself to doing something creative on a daily basis for at least 30 minutes for the next 30 days. It can be drawing, painting, gluing pretty paper onto a journal page, making jewellery...anything creative. Note your daily, creative activity in a journal. I tried this once and it really helped ~

    There is no doubt in my mind that you can do this! Good luck and know we are here to support you and barrack you on each step of the way.

  3. Oh...Serena has such great ideas! I like the creating something daily for 30 days part...and then you could do a seperate blog and post each thing you do, so we can see too! LOL. You are one damn smoking artist, girl!!!

  4. I think we all have seasons of our creativity. It may not be that you're particularly inspired to do that kind of work right now, and when not inspired and still doing it - probably are not going to be very happy with the results.

    I am a trained opera singer. I no longer sing - except to the radio. I play the cello. It's not at my house - it lives as mom and dad's. Right now, I write because it makes me happy. Some day I'll break out the music again and it will mean something. Until then, it just seems a chore.

  5. wowza, girl. I may commission you to do some art from photos one of these days. Am impressed.

  6. Don't be too hard on yourself. I think we all have these conversations with ourselves. It's been an ongoing dialog for me lately.

  7. Do all artists talk to themselves?
    LOL. Hey...what are you and Daya up tpo this weekend...anything fun???

  8. Hey....I hope all is well with you and Daya. (((Hugs)))

  9. Where are you??? I miss you!!! Come back to us!!! LOL.


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