topiary cats

topiary cats

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

The Noisy Neighbors

So I have these really loud neighbors. There's no loud music, the late night noise has significantly improved after my second written complaint when the landlord threatened eviction. But the ceiling thunder. Is awful. I really almost lost it this weekend, I was on such a thin string. All day. Every day. I'm not so unreasonable as to not expect a little noise, but what they have going on upstairs is excessive and definitely not normal.

Their response to my speaking to them in person (twice) is less than encouraging. All they do is get hostile and defensive and complain to me about how loud their neighbors are, as if that's justification for their noise. They think I'm horrible and crazy, and I think they're loud and rude. Cats, if someone came to me and said I was doing something to bother them, I'd at least apologize.

I spoke to the super today, who is going to speak to the landlord. The truth is that I do not want them to be evicted. I don't think that's right. I told the super that. They have 2 little kids, and I'm sure they are nice people. Nice loud people. Ironically I've heard nary a sound from them this evening, which makes me feel bad about speaking to the super. Like I have to keep justifying it to myself. I actually have to keep reminding myself that this amazing quiet is not the norm. Remembering what it's usually like.

And I feel bad for complaining. I hate conflict. I'm not very good at it. But on the other hand I'm proud of myself for standing up for myself. The truth is that the ceiling thunder has really affected me lately. It sounds so stupid but it's true. My nerves have been on edge and I've been much more irritable. My wonderful friend Y. was kind enough to listen to me vent the other night, and she said I was being too nice to the elephants upstairs. She said the thunder would drive her batty too, and it would get ugly. Actually everyone I've mentioned it to has said pretty much the same thing.

It's not my intention to cause problems for anyone. I want peaceful and positive resolution with this. For everyone. But I just don't know what else to do. The thunder is NOT normal, despite what they say. I certainly have never encountered anything like it before in any apartment I've lived in, even when the nocturnal guy lived right above me. And despite my efforts to resolve this, the thunder remains an issue, although not late at night.

This leads me to question the boundaries of 1. learning to transcend irritation and simply not let the noise bother me (I tried, I really did, it didn't work) and I know this is actually the more powerful way, to be unaffected or 2. learn some other sort of lesson in this that I'm unclear of at the moment. I hope it gets clear really soon.

I hope this works out. I do have concern for the elephants, whether or not they would believe it. I don't want them to be upset. But I do tend to put that concern for others over healthy concern for myself, and it's a new feeling to put concern for myself and my needs on an equal level.

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